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Saturday, April 16, 2011

Fault and guilt!

If you are an authority and you order someone, (for example, a king to his people, or a parent to his kid, or a man to his wife) and your order is not followed, then you don't blame them. Admit it, its your fault...


My parents were perfect role model for me. My father was the perfect picture of a dominant and a strict husband and father. I was both in awe and intimidated by him. My mom was the perfect picture of the soft spoken wife and a doting mother.
I believed that, that was the way to be.

In the beginning of my marriage, I looked upon my husband as my mother looked upon and waited on my father.
I would do as he asked, not questioning him, serving him, doing everything I saw my mom do.

Somewhere along the line, I don't know when, I crossed the limits..
Once my husband asked me to do something and I snapped back at him. Only a moment later, I realized my mistake and I was horrified at what I had done! I went back to apologize, but my husband didn't look for an apology. He was actually not bothered by what I had said to him.

I was guilt ridden, my husband is so good!
What if my mom had spoken rudely to my father? I am sure my mom daren't, and if she did, all hell would have broken loose! I remained silently guilty..I wished my husband would have at least shot a reply back to keep my trap in check.

Sometime later, as women often do, I discussed this with my (bhabi) sister in law. She told me that it wasn't my fault, it was his fault, why I did what I did. She explained that there was a reason why we were scared to shit of our fathers..
The Gods don't make them anymore.. or even if he does, the women have become more fearless and spiteful so God doesn't even make women like mom anymore .. :(

Picture from here

6 comments:

  1. gr8 post...I believe times are changing...and probably it is changing for good...:-)

    Cheers!
    SUB

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  2. With the women voicing out,i have a feeling we men have started to get quieter, may be because a little bit of noise is like music for that moment and less responsibility for a period.

    God i just hope they know the pace and space.

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  3. Yeah Sub, times have changed.
    Only today, I saw Baghban (again).. Hema Malini was saying.. time have changed but for a woman.. it will always be the same!! I agree with her!

    Hi venkhat..
    Sure the women have become bolder.. and men quieter.. and you are right about responsibilities!

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  4. you are right...since i cannot offer a solution to that problem...i better SHUT UP :-)

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  5. @ Sub, Oh no. bloggers have a right to NOT shut up ;)

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  6. shazia you are so lucking to have a 100% too good hubby MA

    ReplyDelete