Saturday, October 29, 2011

The real princess

As a girl, I was always dreaming of my prince.
There were many of them, in stories of Rapunzel, in the sleeping beauty, in the Snow White, in Cindrella.
However, there was one princess I was in love with.

She was as mentioned in the book, a real princess.
She had come knocking one day to the castle of the prince who was looking for a real princess. She announced as she came in very nonchalantly that she was a real princess. The queen decided to give her a test and made her a bed of almost 40 mattresses with a pea under the first few mattress. Sure enough the princess could not sleep the whole night and was black and blue all over.

I couldn't take my mind of her. I don't know why, but I had fallen in love with such a delicate creature. I was so tomboyish in my earlier years that even I felt my heart warming up to her. My mind and heart was in turmoil. Is that what a man likes in a woman? A delicate woman? A woman who is like an expensive porcelain? I don't know really, but if I was a real man, I think I would want such a creature to be my princess!

So I err, well, I decided that was what I was too. I flung my tomboyishness to the winds and now all I wanted was to be as sweet and delicate and pretty (she was so pretty in pictures) just like the real princess. I don't know if I became as delicate as her. All I know is to this day, my bed mattress can never be hard (even if doctors seem to suggest that a hard surface is better to sleep in) and the linen should be of the very fine material and very soft. I have conditioned my mind to think I am delicate and I can't sleep without a nice and cosy and soft and clean without even a dot of dirt bed!

Picture from here

Thursday, October 20, 2011

Affairs of life!

A LIE is to LIFE what an extra MARITAL affair is to MARRIAGE

timeless love!

The tree of love bears fruits if it is watered by the sands of time!

Monday, October 17, 2011

Saturday, October 15, 2011

To hell with heaven!

Whats in heaven for women anyways?
I have heard them saying.. heaven is full of overflowing rivers of milk, honey and wine!!
And of course hoooors and apsaras (beautiful women)!!

Now what do I get?
milk? I stopped drinking it even before my milk teeth fell!!
honey? a spoonful is ok, but rivers??
wine? tasted it and cant say it really turn me on!!
beautiful women?? eeeeks !! I am no lesbian!! (sorry to lesbians)

To top it all the men who make it to heaven, the dull slow and boring types?? Get the point?
Whats life(even after death) without someone interesting?

With no offense to Ram, because I am no Sita! I am in love with Ravan
I have tried I swear, but I have never identified with Sita ever.
And these serials nowadays depicting Sita in every daughter in law and a Kaykeyi in every mother in law, greatly pisses me off. Even the filmmakers seem to be smitten by Ravan and all top notch actors only want to do a Ravan. Can I help it if I am in love?

I have decided, heaven is not for me, so to hell with heaven!!

Picture from here

Wednesday, October 5, 2011

Loafer

My Sir called me a loafer and guess what?
I am one.

I remember when he arrived to teach me, I used to get terribly upset.
Seeing him at the door turned me off. The smarta.. that I was, I would pout and make a huge fuss about him coming at the wrong day and time. He usually had no fixed time to come and teach. If he wanted,he could even come on a Sunday.
Being a disciplinarian with regards to time management, (loafers are beeg time managers, they just know what they need time for) I had self banned studies on a Sunday. He on the other hand, made it a point to arrive on a Sunday, and No, he didn't come in the mornings, he usually came to spoil my evenings!! urrghh!
He would plead me to do just one problem and promised me he would go after I did it. Obviously he picked out the toughest which took me more than an hour to solve!!

He always spoiled my Sunday outing plans and I got pissed. He said I was a loafer to be wanting to go out each and every Sunday. He taught me till the day I gave my boards, and then he taught my brother.
Once while visiting my parents, I needed the car which my brother had taken with him as he was taking tuitions from Sir. I called my brother and asked him to get the car. Sir asked him what it was I wanted. When my brother said, didi wants the car, he said, she is still a Loafer!!! :O She must be needing the car to to go out and loaf around!!!!

hmm impressing impression!!

Picture from here

Saturday, October 1, 2011

My lost time

I hate people who ask for a second and take mins and hours and sometimes days!

My good friend especially has no idea what 1 second is all about. Despite my regular efforts to ask him to change his seconds to hours, he still asks for one sec (whatever that means)!!

My husband is as silly as my friend or vice versa!!
He is somewhere miles away and when I ask him what time would he reach home. He always has one answer, 5 mins!

Earlier it was like hell waiting for that SINGLE ONE SECOND to pass, now I simply say Bye, as soon as I hear the dreaded one sec!
Same for my husband, Earlier I used to panic and get ready for him in just under 5 mins and wait for an hour for him to reach, sometimes he just came so late we had to cancel wherever we planned to go or do anything!!
Now, I simply don't expect him to come home in 5 mins or an hour. I simply start getting ready only when I hear the car horns at the gate. After all I can get ready in 5 mins flat, all those practice has not gone to waste!!

Picture from here

drive woman!

The other day while driving my husband lost control of his car. The road was a bit wet and slippery and we just about missed having an accident!!
My husband gave me an apologetic look and I smiled back and said, "its okay, you are allowed these mistakes!" As long as there was no accident or harm done, no need to change seats!!

Now I told him, if it was me who had been driving and skidded over, but not caused any harm, my husband would have immediately blamed the whole of women folks.. "oh you women don't know how to drive at all, which idiot gave you the license? blah blah blah!!
Stop the car right now and get off the driver's seat right now, all the time screaming and giving angry looks!!

It used to happen a lot when I started driving, people always jeered at me. Some policemen just stopped me even for no fault of mine. Taxi drivers yelled when they passed me. Once I got so instigated with another taxi driver because he made a remark as he passed me that I raced after him, overtook him and barked #$@#$#$@# back at him. I still remember the look he had on his face!!

Nobody gets away with me!!

That song is quite apt from the film "Ready, main karoon tho saala character dheela hai!" :P

Picture from here and here