JOKE

I am trying hard to write a joke. I often wonder how people who write jokes do so?
So I tried very hard, and I wanted to laugh and feel silly!
Here it goes..

A woman goes shopping
Woman: Lipstick please
Shopkeeper: You came again? You bought one yesterday...
Woman: I had to keep rubbing it all the time, even when I went to sleep.
Shopkeeper: oh! why?
Woman: I used to apply makeup only when I went out, but now I have to apply all the time because of video calling and my 3G I Phone!

I don't know about my readers but I am having a hearty laugh at my own joke!!

You must think me to be mad to post two very different stories an an ants point of view and this in a single day!!

Picture from here

ants point of view!

We always talk of a birds eye view, An over view of things from the highest heights!!
Lately I am thinking from the ants point of view..
How does an ant see things?
How does an ant see the world as?
Do we look like dinosaurs to them?
Can it happen that we become extinct and then the ants would come into power and they would rule and see us in museums they built? :P Just a thought!

The good thing about the ant is, that they can see the bird, but the bird isn't aware of the ant.
I dont know why I feel like an ant, I think I feel I am doing exactly the same things each day in and day out! I don't have much to feel happy about except perhaps my memories which are so memorable!
Ever seen the ant? They go on doing their work in the most ordinary way and achieve extraordinary results!

I think I identify to their lifestyle, get up and wash, cook, clean, eat, sleep and then wait for the next day to wash, cook, clean....The only difference I think perhaps is that they are fitter and work much harder than I ever could and nothing extraordinary in my work too!

I think I feel small, in the sense that I am unable to change or bring about a change in my life! The only difference between me and the ant is that the ant probably doesn't think as much as I do!

I read something today on the ant's psyche, and then I realized why I felt like the ant. The ant works in the summer and rests in the winter, remember the ant and the grasshopper story? There are 2 things I like about the ant even though I cant say I am totally like it, even though I say I identify with it.
1. The ant works beyond its capacity, it can and does carry loads twenty times its own weight.
2. It has nerve control, meaning knows that the good times (summer) will not last and that the hard times (winter) would be back soon.
This reminds me of my favorite song, "aane wala pal jaane wala hai." A song I listen to in good and bad times!

Picture from here

Fashionable me!

Picture from here 

I never liked to follow anything even fashion for that matter!
When there was a fashion for long dresses I wore short ones..

I remember I wore clothes like the bell bottoms and flared pants of the 70's and I am talking of the 90's.
My mom had a couple of nice dresses of her hay days, and I wore them and stunned everyone. I used to love the attention it got me. I particularly liked one of her fluorescent green bell bottom and jacket,and I even wore it to a school function and heads turned around! So,all the fashionable girls were left behind and I stole the show!

Once upon a time, (it is a fairy tale for me) I was wearing one of those long jumpers with parallels, and it had vibrant stripes which complimented me so well! I was at an ice cream parlor with my sister and an aunt, and as usual being glared at by all.. (maybe I looked like a cartoon out from the 70's, but I like to think otherwise!)
There was a group of young girls and boys, and one of them suddenly came towards us and asked me where I got the dress, I was wearing from? Before I could answer, my aunt said hurriedly, "She is a designer, but she makes only for herself." I gaped at her but smiled at them and didn't really know how to react! I could see they were disappointed, and asked again if I was sure about not designing for others. Again my aunt interrupted and didn't let me say anything. :( sad!

rajasthani lac jewelery

I still dont follow fashion, and I love dressing up in the various traditional outfits of Indian states. Last year I wore a bengali ensemble in white and red saree at my cousin's wedding. A couple of months ago, I was a Rajasthani, replete with a tie and dye suit with their typical lac jewelery and maang tika I love! I am thinking south Indian wouldn't be a bad idea for the next season! And then Assamese, Kashmiri.. Isnt India great??

On cricket

I once loved cricket (http://shaziawish.blogspot.com/2010/10/cricket-fever.html)
Now the on going world cup 2011 isn't of much interest to me.

Even Sachin cant lure me anymore.
I tried to watch the match but I invented a rap instead!


I dont like cricket anyMORE
except in the last over or SO
Its a little too SLOW
and the players a BORE


Thats it for now(and maybe forever).. dont get ideas.. I have no sense of poetry!

red hot

I must write about my ID.. its called redhot and it has misled people so many times..
Althought I must admit I feel a bit awkward when I have to give my ID to someone.

I created this user ID during the time hotmail was in vogue. Actually my first was hotshazia but I forgot the password and then it was lost. Later I made another and I added RED.

Why red? Because its my favorite colour and hot looked cooler with a red prefix! :P

People who know me call me redhot!
Mind you, redhot can mean sexy but in my case it means redhot rage :@
I used to be very short tempered!
No one tried to cross me and incur my wrath.

But actually, I was very nice to people who were good to me.. but the evil in me increased manifold if anyone crossed me. It happened quite often that I exhibited my temper too often! This led to me being known internationally as a very angry girl! relatives abroad ask even now.. not how are you? instead they ask, How is your temper?

The name of course suits me to the T, and it has stuck, though it has added more meaning to it..
Some companies have also copied me like Eveready ..give me red, and recently Vodafone too (kidding)
But a friend has been calling me redhot radio mirchi, giving a whole new dimension to my nick cum ID. This of course has to do with my constant banter which has also resulted in the formation of this blog!

All said and done, I must say redhot is cool and the IN thing! rofl!

picture from here

7 khoon Maaf

I saw this movie last night. I have not been able to rate the movie because I had a splitting headache after watching it. I cant say why I had that headache for two reasons..firstly my baby was crying during the movie and secondly it was quite a dark movie which might have strained my eyes!

I have never reviewed movies in my blog but it is interesting how one person reviews a movie and the other may disagree or have a different view about it, so I am going to give it a shot. I am starting this with this movie because I read that this movie has got mixed ratings, while some have given it a 4 star some have given it as less as 2 stars. Since I watched this in the multiplex I am inclined to give a snapshot as to what the audience remarked for the movie during the interval and after the movie was over .. its interesting to catch on what others have to say immediately after they have watched the movie.

The movie is about a girl played by Priyanka Chopra who was married off by her father to a very eligible but lame soldier played by Neil Nitin Mukesh, but he has an evil character .. too jealous and possesive and ruthless, so she has no choice but to dispose of him. She tries very hard to make her marriage work with the second played by John Abraham who is a singer but turns into a drug addict. The third is a muslim poet played by Irfan Khan in Kashmir who is a very soft spoken urdu poet during the day but a sadistic lover by night.The 4th time she is reluctant to marry but she is coerced  into marriage by the russian but he turns out to be an agent with a wife in each country. 5th is a Viagra popping police officer who demands too much off her, in exchange to burying facts/proofs against her for disposing off her husbands. 6th is a doctor played by Nasiruddin who cures her through mushrooms and then intends to kill her too with mushrooms (remember little mushroom is medicine and too much mushroom is poison). The 7th husband is played by Ruskin Bond himself, who is the writer of this story, which is taken from one of his short stories called Susanna's seven husbands. The 7th murder is left a mystery in the end.. !!
She kills each one with the help of her loyal servants played by Usha Uthup as her maid, her horse jockey and her butler, before marrying the next one, probably because she is a person who doesn't like any loose ends hanging in her life!! The execution of each murder leaves you wondering how is she going to kill the next one, because all of them are done differently, as well as leaving no clue for the police to make her look guilty.

The story revolves around the main protagonist known as Mrs Rodrigues,Susanna, Suzy, Sultana, Anna, Sunaina, and Saheb, in the movie! It was narrated by her stable boy (wonder son of Nasiruddin, Vivaan Shah), her adopted son who had a secret crush for her or rather was it the other way round?

During the interval, the audience was almost crying back for their money, there were loud groans of how bad the movie was and some also thanked god they took the front seats..After the movie, almost everyone kept asking each other..hey who was the last one? the father (Ruskin Bond)? Arun(Vivaan)? Or was it Jesus himself? Christ!!

I know you want to know if I liked the movie.. well the movie inspired me to write about it, such as no other movie has.. and made me google everything about Ruskin Bond and his short stories. I found that I had forgotten that one of his short stories was my favorite in school, called, "The eyes have it." A most complex story writer with a simple style of writing!

Sometimes, some parts or a dialogue of a movie stay with me forever, in a way gives me a lesson or an anecdote on life.. This movie had 2 of it, the first when the narrator Vivaan remarked that people marry in  hurry and repent in leisure and the second where Nasiruddin explains the importance of less and more in life taking the example of the mushroom which if taken less is a medicine and if taken in excess is poison... cool!

Picture from here

hats off

HAT(E)s off to YOU

learn to read between the lines ..

Trip Trap

Trip Trap Trip Trap
Trip over this blog
or get trapped in it!

love vs arranged marriage

While I was in school my moral science teacher gave us a topic for debate .. "love marriages are better than arranged marriages."

I was in class 8. The students had the right to choose for and against the motion.

I was not surprised to see very many students going for the motion and I think it was just a handful of us who was against the motion.

We all had to write on our own and then we could use our own write up to speak in class during the live debate.

I don't know why? Maybe I was a coward at heart, meaning I didn't want to shoulder the responsibility of choosing my own partner or was it the chemistry my parents (and most other relatives too) shared who obviously had an arranged marriage, and lived in total sync and harmony with each other.

I was without any denial against the motion and I poured my heart out..when I wrote against love marriages..

Here is the recollection of what I wrote almost twenty years ago...

Love is said to be blind and I totally agree BUT marriage is not. Marriage is an eye opener.. marriage brings you back to reality, it opens your eyes and makes you see the real life and that while in love you were probably sleeping and dreaming.

The reason I think love marriages cant be successful are as follows..

1. You aren't sure he/she is the "one." Most falling love at a very young age and are not mature enough to understand whether the alliance is good enough for marriage.

2. This is even more grave, your parents are not sure if you are sure and even if they are, you are most probably given a choice .. either you are in (the house) or out (of the house). In urdu there is a proverb, dhobi ka kutta, na ghar ka na ghat ka.. meaning you cannot have your feet on two boats at the same time.

I was sure I wasn't sure of myself and would never have been sure of my love. Apart from this I totally disbelieve in love at first sight or instant love. Anything instant is bad enough even if it is instant coffee and it sure leaves a bad taste in your mouth.!

Now I face a bigger problem, not having chosen for myself, I am not so sure about how to choose the partner for my kids especially my daughter who would be of marriageable age in some years! Hopefully, the whiter my hair becomes, the wiser my mind becomes too..

PS. I didn't like the idea of being the dhobi's dog either!

Picture from here

Simple Sample

Don't try to be a Sample, be Simple.

Why do joint families break?

This is a question which has been haunting me for a while!

Reason, there are too many of them opting for Splitsville in recent times..

I have always seen that it is the younger brother amongst the lot who is in a hurry to separate..

Recently just too many families have gone the same way and the story is more or less the same, i.e that younger wants a separation asap!

Dwelling deeply on this and a discussion with a friend.. I have concluded on two main issues..

1. One of them (usually the younger or the youngest) starts thinking that the others are spending more, again because he has a bigger family or his kids are bigger or maybe of marriageable age and hence have more expenses..in short, this is an expense issue. So, this issue is still solvable by having a more transparent accounting system in which the expenses of each brother has to be paid out of his own pocket.

This has an added advantage of being more responsible of the individual expenses and reduces extravaganza.

2. This brother/partner (younger) might also think,despite him putting in more effort than the others, his profits/income is equally divided which is totally unacceptable to him. He feels that he cannot go on subsidizing for his elder brother and his family and sees them as a threat to his prosperity. Probably he believes he is much better off without the elder!

I have seen this not to be an issue when the roles are reversed, i.e the eldest while putting in more effort will almost never think like this of his brother, and will continue to support him even if the parents are not able to!

Usually in a joint family there is a joint business in which the partners are brothers as well.. Since it is a partnership business, the profits are divided equally. BUT, the dispute arises when there is a difference in the capability of the brothers, which may not be in equal proportions. In families where there are more than two brothers, then also the onus of keeping the family together is always on the eldest. Sometimes, one (mostly younger) of the brothers may also think that he is more capable (perhaps even puts in more effort) but his earnings are being divided equally because of the joint family business. Then this brother doesn't want to stay together and keep subsidizing or providing for others, whom he thinks he can do without..

Elders have said," each of us are like the fingers of a hand, the thumb being the most important finger, but when you close and make a fist, you need the other fingers."

one of the biggest family feud in one of the biggest industry ..!

What perplexes me is that Why is it always the younger who thinks that way?

I have come across families where I have seen the eldest being more capable yet he never or seldom wants to split. I have come across families where the eldest is not at all spendthrift, yet the younger brother is in a hurry to leave.

Perhaps, it might be suppression and the urge to carve a niche out for one self instead of being called a half ticket or chotu as my friend put it..

What angers me is Why do the elder brother wants to keep them all together.. Why does he waste his "golden time" and energy on trying to do the impossible? Why doesn't he look back at history and learn from it, instead of hoping that this time it will be different?

I hope I am born as an eldest brother in the next birth and I swear I will not try to make history, but only learn from it! :@

Picture from here

not a penny more not a penny less

I wonder why people say all the time.. I must give this to my child lest he is deprived of it like I was .. this should never happen to my kids.. he wont have his childhood spoilt like I did!!"
What I don't understand is, whats wrong with you? Do you think you are a bad person and you blame it on your upbringing? In other words, you blame your parents?
Granted there were less amenities before and hence you might not have had a lot many things to make life easy..but then I think that was more of a boon than a curse!!

let me explain why I think like that.
If I am a normal person who has had a not so bad childhood and one who has done fine for himself cannot complain that he has had a bad life.. so what if you were deprived? You are still a good person.. does deprivation makes one bad? NO.. I don't think so .. in fact I think deprivation, in more ways than one helps in us the ability to strive to work harder .. to have a goal in life..Imagine if you got everything, would you be a better person ? I think not.
Just like a top quality diamond, which is formed by undergoing various temperature and pressure changes!
You don't get a good job done without no sweat? No pain = no gain!

I want to bring up my kids just like I was brought up, and believe me that's a far tougher job than bringing them up differently, because while I didn't have things because those things never existed, it is even more difficult to say NO to them ...more so because their cousins or friends have it so why cant they?
As much as we blame the younger generation for their faults, we forget that it is the older generation who raised them in the first place!!
I will bring them up just like I was brought up.. not a penny more , not a penny less!!

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friendly feelings

I am surprised at myself for the kind of feelings I keep having for my friends.
Let me explain via an example.

I have been wanting to buy an i pad or a tablet since it has hit the Indian markets.

My very good friend also wanted to buy one. He discouraged me by saying I didn't really have so much use for it and that I should learn to save money and it is so hard to earn .. blah blah!! 

Sure enough he bought the tablet before I did.

Since he has his tablet, he has been with it most of the time, you know how it is when you get a new bee.

Needless to say, he is in love with it and he keeps telling me about its goodness and merits
I don't think he was aware of how envious I felt, and I hoped that it would fall and break itself.

After 2 days of fiddling with the toy, he confessed it wasn't as good as he had thought it would be!
I let out a phew and a sigh! See, what I mean? I actually felt better because he wasn't as happy as I thought he would be with the tablet.

Then slowly slowly, he told me all the faults it had and that it had very pathetic battery. I started to feel so sorry for him and my heart went out for him. I had secretly wished that the tablet would get destroyed, and now I feel so guilty as if my wish was granted (http://shaziawish.blogspot.com/2011/02/wish-i-had-asked-for-something-else.html).

I am reminded of the scene in the movie 3 idiots where the friends of Rancho are first sad because they couldn't find his name on the pass list and later filled with jealousy when they find he has topped the class!
I can now say I perfectly identified to that scene in the movie! phew!

Picture from here

Whats the hurry?

I know what you must be thinking? (If you have read my earlier blog on doing things today and keep tomorrow free). No, I am not contradicting myself. There are certain things in life for which we should be able to say to ourselves, "whats the hurry?"

Imagine there is a movie releasing and you like watching movies, but whats the hurry? let the reviews float in and then waste or enjoy your money.

Imagine being in love and you want to marry as soon as possible, but again, whats the hurry? Give more time to the relationship and if you can stand each other for a fairly long time, tie the knot.

Imagine going to a shop and you spot something you fancy, whats the hurry? ( I want a tablet PC, :( )

Imagine reading a book and its so thrilling and full of suspense and unputdownable. Do you take a sneak peek to the last page? I hope not. For that will take the suspense out and the book wont be as attractive as it was earlier.
Same logic to some things in life.. and for life itself, live it at leisure! Whats the hurry?

Another one I thought could be used for road signs "HURRY TO BURY." If you drive in a hurry, you are dead and buried :(

Picture from here.

Law of attraction

Now this is one thing I do believe in so much so, that I couldn't list it in my earlier post (http://shaziawish.blogspot.com/2011/02/wish-i-had-asked-for-something-else.html) and wrote a separate post for it altogether!

It is said that when one wishes for something with sincerity then everything within the universe conspires to grant the wish... This is called law of attraction..
Some of my wishes did come true..here they are...think I was lucky :)
1. I wished I had every relation in life.. for eg.. apart from parents, grandparents which thankfully were one each, I had one brother and one sister and I wished that I had one at least for all in laws (brother sister etc). One son .one daugther.. in short I wanted a taste of all relations!!
2. I wished I stayed in a house, not a flat or apartment, but a house which had lots of rooms (and lots of people).
3. I had an aunt who was evergreen, meaning she never looked her age. When she was a mother of 3 and above 30 years of age, she enrolled in a dance school with me and the teacher thought she was 18 only! I wanted to age like her.. gracefully.

All the above has been fulfilled, but for those which hasn't, I think maybe my longing for it, wasn't enough a force in itself to be fulfilled! I am not cribbing at least! (sigh)
Keep smiling ! :) :)

Picture from here

Wish I had asked for something else!

I think I am quite superstitious. My lines on my hand says so too.

Today I wished that I get my broadband back and the next minute the man from the telephone exchange was at the door. I thought, what if I had asked for something else? I believe, the moment I wished, was the golden moment of fulfillment, and if I had asked for something else, maybe a foreign holiday I would get it!
Silly of me. No? But I am like that. And there is no harm in thinking!

Sometimes the glass breaks and I think, the harm was diverted to the glass and so it is a good sign.
Sometimes the crow caws and I think, maybe someone is going to drop in the house.
Sometimes I hurt myself and I think, God punished me for some wrong I did.
Sometimes going somewhere is so full of bottlenecks and I take it as a sign that I shouldn't go there, at least not today.
And I am quite reluctant to cross the path which has just been crossed by a BLACK cat.
Did I forget the black tongue? My god! I am terrified of black tongued people and stay away from them.
hmm.. quite a list! :P

Things that I don't believe meaning not superstitious about are the number 13, I think it is a number and that too a good one. I don't believe in falling stars and making a wish. Neither do I believe in gemstones (we don't get lucky wearing a stone).

Picture from here

First Day First Show!

No, I am not talking about the first day first show for new releases.. This was kinda my motto for my marriage day!

I have been a staunch supporter for arranged marriages, and within that a firm believer that the boy and the girl must not meet or talk even on phones before their marriage..

I was married just before the turn of the century so I cant be called someone from GenOld (well, thats what I thought the word should be for people belonging to the older generation)

I dont regret the fact that I never spoke to my husband, remember I am talking of telephonic conversations, and meeting was definitely out of question.

If people asked me, if I spoke to him and when I shook my head, they wouldnt believe me. I always answered that I preferred the “first day first show”, no previews or sneak peek.. :)

Though I must admit, it was at one point of time very tempting, because there was no one to stop me! My parents being very liberal, never objected to my talking to boys and would have never objected me talking to my fiancée! In fact I know they would have been happy, if I did.

Well, I must give credit to my husband who was my partner in this crime, that is if you see this, kinda first day first show, as a crime!

picture from here

wrongdoers

You don't know you are doing wrong to others, till it is done to You..

Man with SINGh

I think I was very small, for I have a vague recollection of this incident, but it is so funny I must write it to share.

There was this uncle of mine who had friends who visited the house quite frequently.
The first time one friend came (that is the first time I heard of him).
My uncle came from outside and said his friend Singh had come along with him.

There went my imagination, it started to imagine a man with SING meaning horns.
I was curious to see the horned man, and I was eager to go out and see him. I sneaked past everybody and went out and saw a slim built man sans horns on his head! I looked around but he was alone. I kept staring at his head and wondered where the hell was his horns? How come I couldn't see it? Maybe he hid is in his hair, because they were small horns! I thought I would have a better view if he sat down, because he was so tall and I was tiny.

He came in and I was still staring and searching. Then he sat down and I had a better view, still no horns.
At last I couldn't keep my trap shut and asked aloud, " Where is the Sing on his head?"
I don't really remember what happened after I asked this. I only know that to this day, when I am reminded of him, or meet him which I did recently after a very very long time, the sing episode just flashed in my mind!

Picture from here