the bindi and the mangalsutra!

mangalsutra

I am a muslim and we dont wear the bindi and the mangalsutra when we marry.
But, damn it, I simply adore it!
I always loved the typical indian attire, complete with the bindi and bangles! so pretty...
Muslims wear bangles, but not bindi. It is said that the place where I stick the bindi on my forehead will be scorched with fire in hell, so its a taboo. But that didnt stop me from wearing it to school, or to a non muslim party.
I think it suited me, the forehead looked so empty without one.
When I was in high school and went for Saturday extra classes (and movies thereafter) the bindi was a must.
I almost wore it on my engagement till a religiously fanatic relative struck it off my forehead. I was boiling inside but I exercised control, after all I was the bride..
The bindi wish was fulfilled...but I never got to wear a mangalsutra..
Its a nice necklace with a string of black beads and a gold locket at the center...
I thought to buy one at the time of my marriage, but didnt, er...well couldnt, had already bought loads of gold!
I thought I would buy it later, but yet I never came around to buying one..
As I write this, in the middle of the night, I almost have the urge to buy one straightaway, but the shops would be closed.. tomorrow then.. eeeks tomorrow is a Sunday! (not to mention gold is at Rs 20000 per 10 gms)
Oh! I almost forgot the payal.. the one with ghungroos (bells). This is forbidden too, but I have more than one, though I dont wear them, but am thinking of wearing it tomorrow..
Enough is enough, and in any case Adam and Eve couldnt resist the forbidden fruit and I am just a mortal woman

need

Earn more = Spend more?
Need is not needed anymore!

Out of mind!

Out of sight is not out of mind, because seeing me will BLOW you out of your mind!

UP and DOWN!

Just because a woman looks UP and a man looks DOWN while talking to each other does not make women any superior to men (and vice versa)

Why arent there real men anymore?

What is a Man? Just a gender who has a different set of organs as compared to women.
A Man in the real sense of the word was one who was the master of the world.
He commanded respect and had the controls of his life and of his family.
Men who hunted with the wild animals and secured the life of his family.
A Man who had undaunted courage.
A Man who respected the women as one of his mother, sister, daughter or wife and not looked down upon the fairer sex.
To give respect or to be humble are the traits of great men.
Alas! Nowadays if one is humble it is regarded as being a coward and not having enough guts.

I thought a lot about this.. where have this species vanished??
My sister says .. all men are female trapped in a male's body and thus,women folk of today face crisis!

An article I found really interesting on SAVE MEN!
http://entertainment.timesonline.co.uk/tol/arts_and_entertainment/books/book_extracts/article4448371.ece

I dont know how much of this is true, for I believe that there arent any more real women left than any real men . Real women were soft, gentle docile creatures but a strong willed and pious woman who shouldered all her household responsibilities without as much as a whimper!
Now women have become bolder, independent and more manly,so is it not proper for nature to balance the act by a softer more docile man? Who are we (women) to ask where the men are? Ask yourself, "am I a real woman?"
After all I believe its a free world and a free market.. and all this real men and women are market driven really.. no?

Bribing...??

Childhood is all about innocence and I was one innocent child, really!

It was taught in school and by elders that bribing is a bad thing and that we should never indulge in it.
I was a straight girl, if teachers say its bad, its bad. I was very obedient (mark that I use past tense).

My father took us out for an outing or dinner most Sundays, when I was like in my preteens.

I particularly remember one such Sunday when we were out and papa was driving.

There was a new bridge being constructed over the Hooghly (The Vidyasagar Setu) and since it was already years under construction and it looked almost complete, we decided to try it for a drive.
After reaching almost the middle of the bridge we saw a police patrol. They made us stop the car and admonished us for driving over an unbuilt unopened bridge. To which my father said that there was no sign to tell us that we were forbidden entry. The policeman said that we would be fined for the offence.

It was probably a big amount. Papa wanted to give a small bribe amount so that he wouldn't have to pay the fine, but I was adamant. How could he bribe? That is not done! It was against my morals. I told papa, no bribe and that officer couldn't fine us because there ought to be a sign telling us that entry was forbidden. Why did they have to be patrolling the middle of the bridge, when they should have been near the start of the bridge.
I said let him call a bigger officer and we can argue our way, because apparently to me, we were not wrong.

We waited for him to call the senior official for an hour or so, but there was no sign of any official coming our way. It was getting darker and I noticed that the patrolling policeman was in no hurry to fine us, but he was looking quite willing to settle for an amount for himself! My father asked me if he could (I respect my father for having so much faith and patience to care for my moral values). I let go, sensing that, that was the only solution then, and papa handed the policeman a note and we turned the car back!

picture from here

That was the first time I realized that rules are just meant to be broken and that its a bad bad world out there!
A small part of me died....

No Dilwale for me :(

Ahem ahem! This would sound very filmy.. But its true.

I have already mentioned I was engaged just after high school, and that was the year I went to my last school trip with friends. The movie, DDLJ was released on 20th October 1995 and I went on the trip in December 1995.
In the movie, the heroine is already engaged to someone she has never met by her conservative father, and on a trip with her friends when she meets her love..This was similar to my situation where I was also engaged, never seen my fiancé, and on a trip. My friends and teachers kept comparing me to the character of the girl in the movie. Inadvertently, I started wishing..maybe I would too...meaning.... find my love :P
Unlike the heroine who was in London and her trip was the swiss alps (oh lalala), I had to make do with south India! Thinking that anyone could be the ONE for me, I was very vigilant and one could call it, quite open to flirtatious endeavors.

It almost happened in Bangalore, I was at Big Kids Kemp, and the salesman was a really cute guy, and he gave me a lot of attention (and I let him). I was trying to pick up a tie and there was so many and I couldnt decide which one to take, and suddenly I did not want to buy any. But since it would sound rude of me to say I didnt like any, after he had shown me hundreds of ties, I coyly told him that I liked the one he was wearing and that nothing he showed me was as good as his tie! He said, it was bought from some other shop and there was not much chance of it being in the store, but he would still try and check with all his might. I was quite relieved and I thought that he would never find it and I would have saved my money..Lo and behold! he got it in 5 minutes and there was more than one! naturally I had to pay for my overtures. It was a cheap tie and that salesman must have got it for 5 times lesser than what I paid for it. It still has never been worn and serves only as a memoir of that incident!

The Tie still packed!

The rest of the trip was fun, but event less!

I went back and married the one my father chose for me.. period!

Found time

TIME is the most valuable FIND

problem of plenty

See, I dont want to talk big, and I sincerely apologize if what I am going to write sounds like beeg mouth (or as my daddy calls me "A Snob")
I was awesome, since I was small. I kept discovering that I was quite good in anything I did, it was only a matter of interest. If something intrigued me enough, I set my mind and heart on it.
I will try to put them in chronological order..

While still a child I was good in swimming, so I was a swimming champ (of course! only in my mind)
In fact I liked playing a lot, any kind of sport (considering that I considered my self to be a boy, I preferred outdoor sports) and I was game for it. As I grew up, I found cycling very exhilarating, so cycle champ! (again in my mind)

I used to scribble whenever I had a pencil in my hand, my fingers went hm mmm mm... Suddenly the scribbles turned into intrinsic designs and I started creating lovely designs, it could be used to design textile, jewellery, mehndi. bindi... Some scribblings I found along with my books..

                                                                  free hand scribblings!

My art teacher was awed and called me a jewel which was not cut yet (like an uncut diamond). She implored me to take up Arts in higher classes. (though I promised her, I never did)

Then I was coaxed by my sister to learn some embroidery, I found I was excellent in needle work and it earned me laurels from my mother in law, who was delighted by my needle art. I was not too bad in tailoring and could stitch anything to perfection. (blush)

What I am trying to say here is that I had a problem of plenty, meaning since I was so good in so many diverse things, I got confused at times, and didnt know what to really take up seriously enough!
Maybe I was just a jack (in the box) of all and master of none!
When there is plenty to choose, we choose plenty! no?

blo(g)ock

latest on the blo(g)ock

money tummy

The root of all evil
Its not Money
Its the Tummy

Be(ad)have

Badder we think we are, better we behave.

Hooked on books

                                                                Picture from here
The merit goes to my kindergarten friend for introducing me to books.
Well, she does not remember me though I found her on facebook, and I don't blame her (nothing special about me)

My first book was the ginger bread boy, yes it was a fairy tale but I was in KG remember!
I was unstoppable. As soon as a book finished I wanted another, used to sneak and hide and read just like the kid in the bajaj ad. Nowadays I rarely find any child reading like that, they are more into movies, cartoons, gameboy, psp, wii..I was wondering, if the ad was released now, it would sound so obnoxious, after all, very few can relate to reading ( even story books) with that kind of fervor ( my kids don't).

Once, my exams were just over (I was 12), I wanted a book desperately but my mom wouldnt take me to the market to buy me one. Being the angry girl that I was, I set out on foot even though I had a very vague idea of the directions to the market. (quite a distance from my house) and I being mostly chauffeur driven, had never embarked on a foot journey. I went on walking and after walking for nearly an hour I had not yet reached it, suddenly I got scared and fear got the better of me so I decided to call it quits and turned back. Since I was tired by walking so much I took a rickshaw ( hand pulled one). I had the better sense not to take a cab (fear of kidnap).

I swiftly progressed from the fairy tale books to Nancy Drews, MB's, Chase, Sheldon, Robbins, Segal, Archer, Steele,  more recently Dan Brown, Ayn Rand, Gardener to name a few. Of course there were comics .. like tinkle, chandamama, chacha chaudhury, mandrake, phantom, tintin and of course Archie.

Books are my best companion, second only to the internet now... :P cant go on blaming the kids for their game frenzy, when I am also addicted to the net now!

Day Night

DArk DAy
lIGHT nIGHT

Wooman

Woo a man and you are a Woman.

To be or not to be..

I knew what course I would take up, when I was 11 years old.

I was business oriented, so I had already chosen my subjects. We had arts, home science, computers and economics to choose from, in class 9-10. In spite of the fact that economics was a low scoring subject, I was undeterred and chose it. In high school I took up commerce which had other subjects like accounts.

My sister and me always dreamed of starting our own business. Our mom always told us, " both of you are not pretty enough, so you better study and learn to be on your own feet." implying that nobody would want to marry us, the general dictum being only beautiful and "fair" girls married.

While both of us thought we were not so bad, we remained in doubt of our looks!
There were mixed feelings inside me, on one hand I was relieved and happy because I could pursue a career and lead an independent life, but on the other utterly disappointed because I wasn't pretty! Urgghh!!

....mindless image....

I was seriously contemplating my career and focusing in my studies. Just when I finished high school, there came a marriage proposal, and I looked at myself in the mirror, "not bad at all." And before I gave my career a second thought, I got engaged (just on the day I got my high school results). The marriage followed soon and whoosh! here I am making a family instead of a factory!

I dont know what to tell my daughter now.. tie the knot or to work.. to be or not to be?
On second thoughts, I am quite comfortable with my life.. after all "yeh aaraam ka maamla hai" (matter of great comfort). :P

Money and Culture

My sister wrote this on her facebook status update
"Money comes fast and goes fast but culture comes slow and goes also very slow"
This got me thinking...
I realized the importance of culture.
Culture imbibes in us the ability to digest money.
When we have culture we do not give money much importance.

The upcoming gen next sure knows how to make smart and quick money, but alas! they do not know how to save it!
We can derive from this, the fact that culture makes us cautious and if we have culture, money is sure to come, but no smart hot money, but slowly slowly, solid and lasting.

With money and no culture.. money does not stand a chance.
With money and culture.. money stays.
So money is directly proportional to culture.

So all you guys reading this.. get a brush up on culture, before its too late!!

Cricket fever!

Noooo, I never was a very big cricket freak (apart from playing bat and ball when I was very small).
For a lot of people, Cricket is almost a religion and if everyone became a cricket fanatic we could have a war only because of cricket..

Cricket fever caught me in the face of Sachin tendulkar!
Ever since the day I saw him. (in real) sigh!!

I still remember vividly, I was at the Taj Bengal, having a buffet lunch with my sister and aunt, and as we stepped out of the coffee shop, my aunt nudged me and said "Sachin." He was right there in front of me and I was dumbstruck..He looked cho cute. I had seen him on TV but he looked so much cuter right there and he looked at me.. I almost fainted!
Now, I was a very headstrong and egoistic girl, I wouldn't dream of going to him, even for autograph, though a bunch of girls came from nowhere and started harassing him and trying to get close to him. I was like, "okay, so girls might be after you, but not me (as if he cared two hoots). Soon the entire Indian team came  and boarded a bus and went away.
The ride back home was spent swooning and dreaming about, what if, i did go to him.......

After this, I hit on cricket big time. I wouldn't dream of missing any matches where India played and wouldn't miss a ball ever. Soon it was time for world cup 1996 and the semi finals was to be held in Eden Gardens, Calcutta. The teams were India and Sri-lanka. I was desperate to see Sachin again and I had to get myself a pass to be able to go to the stadium and watch him LIVE. I did get the pass and a cousin for company.
I watched the match till Sachin got out and we decided we should return as the match would go on till midnight. When Sachin got out, all hopes of a win was squashed and it was our good fortune we left, because the match was abandoned shortly thereafter, as the spectators got angry and started burning posters and throwing empty bottles on the field..
Here is a picture of the incident..(from this site)

It was a shameful act by Calcutta, and is still a black mark on Eden Garden's history.
Anyways, like all my wishes, this too was a hit and a miss.
In any case, he was already married.. :(